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Jesus Swept by James Alexander Protzman

Midwest Book Review
Jesus Swept is an entertaining story filled with enthralling characters ranging from stereotypical hippies, would be messiahs, and even Jesus himself. Spiritual, philosophical, witty, entertaining, yet respectful, "Jesus Swept" takes the world of Christianity and turns it upside down in the most entertaining way possible.


From Chapter Three

Plopped on a boggy slice of Atlantic oceanfront, the Sunrise Beach Holiday Travel Park claims fifty RV hook-ups and a dozen single wides, but only three year-round residents. Hook, Sinker, and Eddie Junior.

Eddie Junior, the park manager, lives in the tidy Coachman Classic near the front gate. Hook and Sinker own the Roadliner on lot fifteen.

The twins inherited the decrepit trailer from their daddy, the same half-wit who gave them their nicknames a dozen years ago. He’d parked the piece of junk for what would prove to be the last time, downed six shots of Jim Beam, and started a list of unflattering descriptors for his two children. With no mother to soften the abuse, the kids grabbed hold of their Hook and Sinker labels and tried to stay afloat.

“Quit your damn whining,” says Hook. She’s tending Sinker’s ear in their mess of a kitchen. Despite a five-star hangover, her hands are mostly steady. The scratchy buzz of a fluorescent light over the sink grates on her brain, putting her on edge. “You don’t want this getting infected. You still don’t got insurance, you know.”

“And I still don’t need no lecture from no shit-ass cashier.” Sinker sprawls in a folding chair, glassy-eyed and hangdog, blood gooing in a thick red rope down his neck. He drags on a Salem and blows smoke in Hook’s face.

Still not having insurance is a sore point with Sinker, who covets his sister’s glamorous job stocking shelves at Bobby’s Fishing Superstore in Jacksonville. The store provides her with something resembling health coverage, plus the chance to see what’s hot in saltwater fishing gear. But Hook pays for her benefits. As the only woman on the payroll with a Barbie-doll body, she swallows a daily dose of harassment from all the men who work there, including the pervert who owns the store. Old Bobby Beak, brother of Bill, just can’t seem to keep his mouth shut about Hook’s tits and tattoos.